Today I met with the Social Work advisor at school and officially declared my major and discussed what my plan should be moving forward. I feel like I am so behind I can't even believe it. I really should be spending the spare time I have right now working on a project I have to present tomorrow...
I am already starting to feel burned out on school and I am just finishing up my first semester back... it is going to be a long couple years. I know it'll be worth the effort -- but I also know that the work load is going to get heavier and more difficult as each semester passes. I can't even fathom going to grad school -- which I have to do to work in a school setting.
I wish I could say that school is all I am worried about right now, but of course that would make my life far too easy -- and who wants that?
A friend of mine made plans to come over to my house after work one day and never showed. My husband had cooked dinner, we had cleaned and were really looking forward to having a friend over. I was a bit bummed out when I never heard from him at all -- so I called the next day to figure out what had happened (I assumed that his phone had died and he had no way to contact me)
The story I got was : "I went out after I got off of work (he was off two hours before me) and had a few drinks for about an hour, then I went home and just passed out, and my phone was dead, so I couldn't call." When I expressed my disappointment about what happened he started to tell me I was making him feel guilty, I should get over it -- things happen, and that this wasn't the first time I had made him feel guilty about plans falling through. I was shocked because I was not expecting this. I told him that it wasn't that I was trying to make him feel guilty but that I was genuinely looking forward to spending time with him and was bummed out that it didn't happen. I tried cutting the call short because I wasn't in the mood to argue (and he clearly was) so he told me that he had called off from work (our busiest day of the week) and we hung up.
When I got to work later that day I heard some of my coworkers talking -- clearly annoyed -- about how my friend had called off from work. Then I got the news that he had in fact been out (with one of our fellow coworkers and friends) drinking until at least 4 in the morning and had never once mentioned that he had plans with me. *BAM* I felt like someone had punched me in the stomach... I haven't spoken to him since I found out, and I am sure that he knows that I know he lied to me. He hasn't attempted to call or get in any sort of contact with me. I don't know what to do.
I just don't want to be around him right now. He lied to me, a useless lie, and then scolded me for making him feel bad about ditching me. What do I do with that?! I have never been in a situation like this before. I can't just stay mad at him forever because I have to work with him... I feel sad and angry and confused. I don't want to look at him, I don't want to work with him and I don't want to deal with talking about this again. As far as I am concerned he killed the beginnings of what could have been a great friendship.
